The Grim Reapers of Precinct 74: A Post Mortem Transcript - Dooley & Monaghan

 

Post Mortem - Interview Transcript

Interviewee: R#64357 Dooley & R#63584 Monaghan

Interviewer: R#78225 Helena

Date: ?/?/23

Location: Post Mortem HQ

List of Acronyms: H – Helena, D – Dooley, M – Monaghan

 

(Start of Interview)

 

H: Thank you both for agreeing to this series! You know, I can still do individual interviews if you like–

 

D: We do everything together. Trust me, this interview will be much more interesting that way.

 

H: Alright, then. Why don’t you introduce yourselves!

 

D: I’m Dooley and this is my guy Monaghan. We go by our surnames because why be like everyone else? I’ve been everywhere – never really grew up in any one particular place, never established roots anywhere. Can’t say I lived an honest life and I’m not going to tell you what all I’ve done, but I can at least say my life was full and exciting. All 25 years of it! And Monnie here–

 

H: Why don’t you let him introduce himself?

 

M: Oh, I can? Well, um, I grew up in Tipton, Kansas. It’s a, uh, small town. Like really, really small. I was a theater major at the University of Kansas and I was hoping to make it to Broadway. I had so many dream roles I wanted to perform…

 

D: Come on, lighten up! We don’t want to depress Helena’s readers.

 

H: On the contrary, readers who are new Reapers might connect with Monaghan’s sense of loss. It’s not depressing at all – it’s a potential point for connection!

 

M: Oh…thank you.

 

H: You both haven’t been Reapers for long, have you?

 

D: Not really. I mean, I’ve been one for five years and he’s been with us for three. But rest assured, we’ve seen our fair share of action. You don’t have to work a long time to deal with a lot of things.

 

H: Oh, absolutely! So, since you two are doing this together, how did you meet? Why do you choose to work together? There aren’t many Reapers that do so.

 

D: Well, there aren’t many Reapers that genuinely look out for each other, you know? I mean, yeah, we all see each other in the field, around Tenebra, in The Clavicle, whatever. But there’s no real bonding at all. No one taking the other under their wing. It’s important, especially for us new folks, you know?

 

H: Haven’t you thought of applying for the apprenticeship program? You know, the one Mark started five years ago where new Reapers can learn under veterans?

 

D: Are you kidding? We already have enough overbearing dynamics with the basic training. You don’t need more authority figures. You need rapport, comradery! Does that make sense? You need a sense of brotherhood with your fellow Reapers. And so, when I saw Monnie all bright-eyed and alone, I took it upon myself to make things easy for him. It’s what I wanted when I started and I had the feeling it’s what he wanted, too.

 

M: I was really lost. I still feel really lost, if I’ll be honest. But having someone like Dooley by my side helps.

 

H: How do you think that helps, Monaghan?

 

M: Well…I don’t know what I believed before I died. About the afterlife, I mean. But I wasn’t expecting any of this and I certainly didn’t expect to be a Reaper at all. Everything was a lot to take in, so…when Dooley said we could work together, I was relieved. It’s nice to not be so alone.

 

H: That is a valuable insight, indeed. Having a buddy at the start could be very helpful to new Reapers. Now, to switch to a different point, do you think anything about your former lives prepared you for Reaper work? Or at least indicated you might be good at this?

 

M: Speaking for myself–

 

D: Oh, absolutely! I mean, again, I’m not going to tell you all the things I got up to. But let’s just say that my skills of, shall we say, entering unique places and sneaking around certainly helps me out. (pause) How about you, Monnie?

 

M: I don’t think so…I was only 20 when I died. My life had just begun. The things I was good at were singing, acting…and I wasn’t that good at dancing, but I was going to be. My soft shoe skills were improving–

 

D: You’ll have to forgive him. He’s still very emotionally attached to life in the Mortal Plane.

 

H: I can assure you, Monaghan, you are not alone in that department! There are even seasoned veterans who still wax nostalgic for their former lives. I do from time to time, myself!

 

M: Really? When were you–

 

D: Don’t ask questions like that. Besides, who’s supposed to interview who in this situation? Next question, Helena.

 

H: Well, I just have two remaining ones for you. You can provide your own answers for these. First question – what is your most memorable experience on the job?

 

D: Would you like to go first?

 

M: No, you go ahead.

 

D: Alright! Well, I’d have to say my most memorable experience was collecting the soul of one of my old friends. The instructors make you very aware that there is a slim chance something like that could happen. Even though, you know, higher ups are supposed to filter things out so we don’t have anything to do with former ties in the mortal plane and all that. Anyway, so I’m in his living room, where he’s been drinking and when his soul emerges, I wonder if he’ll recognize me.

 

M: Our instructors said–

 

D: Yeah, I know. That our faces are scrambled so no one recognizes us. I get it. But this guy was one of my longest, most loyal friends. I kind of hoped that connection could see us through facial amnesia. But…he didn’t know who I was at all. At least, he knew what I was, but he didn’t know I had an identity beyond being a Reaper. He was scared as all hell when he saw me.

 

H: An unfortunate reality we all have to accept. Monaghan?

 

M: I don’t have really many memorable experiences as a Reaper. Any moments are connected to my old life.

 

H: Well, then, what was a memorable moment in your life?

 

M: It was my senior year of high school. I’d been involved in the community theater for forever, but I’d never landed a role bigger than a super-secondary character with less than a handful of spoken lines. Then one year, I was the understudy for the part of Sky Masterson in Guys and Dolls. And the night before the opening performance, the actor for Sky broke both legs.

 

D: Wait, what? You never told me that part of the story!

 

M: Yeah. Apparently he had too much to drink the other night and he tripped down the steps leading out of the bar.

 

H: Well, if that isn’t the most rotten luck!

 

M: I know. That suddenly threw me into the spotlight. And…being Sky Masterson for a week was the most glorious experience of my life. Better than graduation, better than getting accepted into the college of my choice, better than my first date. Everyone loved me, too! I got great applause at the ending bows. (pause) I was going to be someone.

 

H: Well, we’re glad to have someone so talented and passionate here. Goodness knows, we could do with a lot more passion in the field.

 

D: By passion, do you mean musical numbers in the final moments of the dead?

 

H: Anyway, the final question is what’s the most important thing you think you’ve learned?

 

D: That this world is like our world. The higher ups have no idea what they’re doing and the lower rungs do all the work.

 

M: You can’t say that.

 

D: Yes, I can.

 

M: But do you think that’ll be usable at all? People will read this – new Reapers will read this.

 

D: Does it look like that bothers me? They’ll find that out soon enough for themselves, anyway. In case that’s not newspaper-friendly, Helena, my answer to that would be listen to the instructors, but trust your instincts. At the end of the day, all the studying in the world won’t help you for all the surprises you run into in the field. And believe me, Monnie and I have run into a lot more surprises than anyone prepares you for!

 

M: That is true.

 

H: And you, Monaghan?

 

M: The most important thing I’ve learned? Find someone to be with. Find them fast. Because…well, let’s just say, there’s a lot of rough edges in the Reaper world. It’s an easier life if you’ve got someone by your side. Someone who cares. Or least, cares enough. 

 

H: Well, thank you both so much for your time!

 

D: Thank you for having us, Helena!

 

M: Yes, thank you.

 

(End of Interview)